RPAGF Chapter 34 How can you, not being a fish, know the joy of fish?
Chapter 34 How can you, not being a fish, know the joy of fish?
Chapter 34 How can you, not being a fish, know the joy of fish?
Wang Wenzhou carefully invited his mother into the back office.
Yang's face was long the whole way, and she looked furious.
Wang Qiang tugged at Wang Wenzhou's sleeve and whispered a reminder: "Young Master, be careful!"
Wang Wenzhou sighed. Having a strict mother at home is truly a great tragedy in life.
Madam Yang plopped down in the main seat, slammed her hand on the table with a loud "bang," and roared, "You unfilial son! Kneel down!"
During his time in the Ming Dynasty, Wang Wenzhou discovered that being a man was truly enjoyable; not only could he have multiple wives and concubines, but he also enjoyed high social status. The only drawback of the Ming Dynasty compared to later generations was the absolute deference that younger generations had to show to their elders. In the Ming Dynasty, the hierarchy was based on Heaven, Earth, Ruler, Parents, and Teacher; parents and elders were considered supreme beings.
Wang Wenzhou shifted his position, wanting to kneel, but then felt it was too humiliating. Why should he kneel? Even if his mother wasn't his real mother, she didn't need to kneel all the time! If someone kneels for too long, it will be very difficult for them to stand up straight again.
"I wonder what mistake I have made?" Wang Wenzhou asked.
"You unfilial son! Don't you know you're wrong!" Madam Yang asked sternly, "Xiaoqiang, where is your grandfather?"
"Hmm..." Wang Qiang hesitated, looking at his young master, thinking, "Young master, do you want to admit your mistake yourself? Or should I admit it for you?"
"Mother, Old Wang went to Hezhou on business," Wang Wenzhou casually made up.
"How dare you! You unfilial son, how could you deceive your mother like this?" Madam Yang slammed her fist on the table in anger.
"Hehe..." Wang Wenzhou chuckled awkwardly, glancing at the servants. They all had their heads bowed low. They must have been the ones who had spoken out of turn, revealing their identities to their mother.
These servants were elderly men brought from the newly established Marquis's residence. How could they dare not tell the truth when their own matriarch asked?
“Mother, Old Wang has made a mistake. I am now the magistrate of Hanshan County. As the saying goes, even a prince is subject to the same laws as a commoner. Although Old Wang is our steward, I cannot bend the law for personal gain. I lied to you because I was afraid you would be upset if you knew. Don’t worry, I will release him in a few days. He will be well-fed and cared for in there and will not suffer any injustice,” Wang Wenzhou said with a smile.
Yang stared blankly at her beloved son. What was wrong with him? She suddenly felt that the person in front of her was not her son. Before, whenever her son made a mistake, she only needed to scold him a few times, and he would be so frightened that he would beg for forgiveness and admit his mistake. It had only been a few days since she last saw him, and her son seemed like a completely different person.
"You unfilial son! How dare you argue! Please administer the family punishment!" Madam Yang roared.
A servant handed the "family rules" to Madam Yang.
Yang picked up the family law and walked up to Wang Wenzhou, then brandished it and began to whip him.
"Clap clap clap..."
Wang Wenzhou was very frustrated. He couldn't really find fault with a mother hitting her son. But he was a transmigrator! Not some "own son" whom she could beat and scold at will!
"Huff, huff..." Yang hit Wang Wenzhou, clutching her waist and panting heavily.
"Mother, you must be tired too!" Wang Wenzhou said with a smile. "I'll tell you a story, so you can rest for a bit. You can continue playing later when you're rested."
"That day I was lying on the street sunbathing, catching lice. I caught one and flicked it into the air with style. I closed my eyes, opened my mouth, and, by feel, found the spot where the louse would land. I stuck out my tongue and swallowed it, savoring it slowly. It was truly a delicacy, so delicious!" Wang Wenzhou gesticulated wildly, recounting the story with great emotion. As he spoke, he closed his eyes, looking completely absorbed in the moment.
"Hehe..." Zhang Jiao covered her mouth and chuckled. That fatso was really too funny.
"At that moment, I saw an adorable dog with snow-white fur; a thin, short tail that kept wagging; and two big, round eyes that sparkled like crystal-clear pearls. It walked over with a pigeon-toed gait, and as it walked, the dog suddenly lowered its head and happily ate something."
I thought to myself, what could be more delicious than fleas? The dog's face was beaming with such happiness, so I went over to investigate. When I saw what the dog was eating, I felt nauseous and threw up.
The dog was eating poop! It really was eating poop! I was furious and slapped the dog twice across the face.
The dog looked at me innocently, as if asking me why I hit him.
I was furious and yelled: "What the hell are you?! Are you a mad dog?! Do you know what you're eating?! Are you a reincarnated starving ghost?! You're eating shit!"
Wang Wang!
The dog barked at me a few times, then ran to a spot not far away with its poop in its mouth and continued to eat it with relish.
I slapped my forehead, realizing how stupid I had been. How could a dog understand human speech? Dogs aren't people. If you spoke to a dog in human language and it could understand, would it still be a dog?
As the saying goes, chickens don't remember being beaten, but dogs certainly do. So I picked up a brick and walked over.
The dog was looking down, happily eating its poop, completely unaware that I was approaching.
I smashed a brick over the dog's head: "Damn it, you're going to eat shit! Do you even know how disgusting shit is?!"
Blood immediately flowed from the wound on the dog's head, staining its originally white fur with several red marks.
The dog, still dazed from being hit, looked up at me, bared its teeth, and barked wildly.
Damn it! How dare you act tough with me. I picked up a brick and hit the dog on the head a few more times. The dog immediately cowered, lowered its head obediently, and wagged its tail at me.
Damn it, you're just a bully relying on your master's power. You don't even have a proper body, yet you dare to act tough with me. If I don't teach you a lesson, you won't know how many eyes the King of Horses has.
I picked a flea and stuffed it into the dog's mouth, watching as the dog obediently ate it.
I gently stroked the dog's head with a smile, saying nothing.
So, I caught a louse for myself to eat, and then caught another louse to share with the dog, all while sunbathing.
Seeing the dog's obedient expression, I said softly, "Brother, you know what? You're adorable, you're the kind of dog people like. But do you know why I hit you? You shouldn't eat poop! Lice are the most delicious food in the world. You're so cute, how could I let you eat such disgusting poop? If I didn't like you, I definitely wouldn't let you eat the most delicious lice in the world. If I didn't like you, I definitely wouldn't care if you were eating poop. If I didn't like you, what does it matter to me whether you eat poop or not?"
Suddenly the dog looked up at me, tears streaming down its face along with the blood: "Big brother, I really don't like eating fleas! I really only like eating poop!"
I was stunned. What the hell? A dog that can talk.
I took a deep breath, gradually calming my shocked heart, and earnestly advised: "Brother, how can you like eating shit? You need to know that shit is the most disgusting thing in the world! I'm only telling you not to eat shit for your own good!"
The dog wiped a mixture of blood and tears from the corner of its eye with its paw: "Dude, I really love eating poop! You know what? Eating poop is my favorite thing in this life. If I can't eat poop, I'd rather die!"
I was confused, so I asked the dog: "Does poop really taste that good?"
"Waaah..." the dog said in a tearful voice, "You are not a dog, how can you know the joy of a dog?"
After saying that, the dog carried away the leftover poop in its mouth...
Watching the dog walk away, I felt even more confused. Is poop really tastier than fleas?